Microsoft Toaster

If toasters were made by Microsoft, then this would be the case:
- *Every* time you bought a loaf of bread, you would have to buy a toaster.
- You wouldn't have to take the toaster, but you'd still have to pay for it anyway.
- Toaster'2000 would weigh 15,000 pounds (hence requiring a reinforced steel countertop), draw enough electricity to power a small city, take up 95% of the space in your kitchen, would claim to be the first toaster that lets you control how light or dark you want your toast to be, and would secretly interrogate your other appliances to find out *who* made them (and if possible, destroy them)!!
- Every year, a new toaster will be released, BIGGER and BEAUTIFUL than ever (after all, those are the most important things in a good toaster, right?). And, although it will work slower than the older toasters, you would still buy them since most of the good and fresh bread can be toasted using *only* Microsoft Toasters!