Religious Jokes
112 jokes
Adam and the Garden of Eden
After the fall in the Garden of Eden, Adam was walking with his sons Cain and Abel.
⛪Angels, Greed, and Sacrifice
Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family. The family was rude...
⛪Atheism Definition
Definition of Atheism: a non-prophet organization.
⛪Atheism and Kleenex
If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?
⛪Atheist Insurance
Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?
⛪Atheist vs. Loch Ness Monster
An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly his boat was attacked by the Loch Ness mon...
⛪Atheist's Holiday
An atheist complained to a friend, "Christians have their special holidays, such as Christmas and Ea...
⛪Bible Belief
Do I believe in the Bible? Hell, man, I've seen one!
⛪Bible's Chicken Road Passage
THE BIBLE: And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the r...
⛪Bill Gates and St. Peter
When Bill Gates died, he went up to Heaven, where Saint Peter showed him to his house; a beautiful 2...
⛪Bishop and the Vision
A Bishop was approached one morning by a Priest. "Your Eminence," the Priest said, "there's a young ...
⛪Bless My Computer
Every evening As I'm laying here in bed This tiny little prayer Keeps running through my head God b...
⛪Brandi and the Lotto
A blond woman named Brandi finds herself in dire trouble. Her business has gone bust and she's in se...
⛪Brother John's Silent Monastery
Brother John entered the 'Monastery of Silence' and the Chief Priest said, "Brother, this is a silen...
⛪Children's Prayers
One little girl began her prayer like this: "Our Father, who are in heaven, hello! What be Thy name?...
⛪Church Sayings
* You are not too bad to come in. You are not too good to stay out. * Come in and let us prepare yo...
⛪Church Service Deaths
One Sunday morning the pastor noticed little Johnny was standing staring up at the large plaque of n...
⛪Church Song Leader
There was a church where the preacher and the song leader were not getting along. This began to spil...
⛪Conversion
Two old Jewish men are strolling down the street one day when they happen to walk by a Catholic chur...
⛪Devil = Dad?
Two youngsters were walking home from Sunday School, each deep in his own thoughts. Finally, one sai...
⛪Devil's Dad Theory
Two youngsters were walking home from Sunday School, each deep in his own thoughts. Finally one said...
⛪Divine Sign
Four members of the clergy had a theological argument, with the three male ministers siding against ...
⛪Dust and the Maker
What is a violin without the bow? What is dust without the Maker? Who would say, "Look at the dust, ...
⛪Family of the Groom
The young ladies were taking their final vows to become nuns at the Mass. The presiding bishop notic...
⛪Finding God
"Do you think I'll ever find God?" "No!" "Oh," he responded, "I thought that was the product you wer...
⛪Fishing and Walking on Water
I don't care WHO you are, you're not walking on the water while I'm fishing.
⛪Franken in Heaven
Senator Franken dies and goes to heaven...
⛪Funeral Service Timing
One Sunday morning the pastor noticed little Johnny was standing staring at the large plaque that hu...
⛪God and Alka-Seltzer Comparison
- God is like Alka-Seltzer - Try Him - you'll like Him.
⛪God and Allstate Comparison
- God is like Allstate - You're in good hands with Him.
⛪God and Delta Comparison
- God is like Delta - He's ready when you are.
⛪God and Dial Soap Comparison
- God is like Dial Soap - Aren't you glad you have Him? Don't you wish everybody did?
⛪God and Fajitas
If God is inside us, then I hope he likes fajitas, cause that's what He's getting tonight.
⛪God and General Electric Comparison
- God is like General Electric - He brings good things to life.
⛪God and Scotch Tape Comparison
- God is like Scotch Tape - You can't see Him, but you know He's there.
⛪God and Sears Comparison
- God is like Sears - He has everything.
⛪God and VO-5 Hair Spray Comparison
- God is like VO-5 Hair Spray - He holds through all kinds of weather.
⛪God and the End of the World
Every time someone predicts the date of the end of the world, God pushes the date back a little, jus...
⛪God and the Platypus
On the sixth day, God created the platypus. And God said: "Let's see the evolutionists try and figur...
⛪God and the U.S. Post Office Comparison
- God is like the U.S. Post Office - Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet, nor ice will keep Him from H...
⛪God as a Comedian
God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
⛪God's Left Hand
Little Bobby was spending the weekend with his grandmother after a particularly trying week in kinde...
⛪God's Love for You
If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it. If God had a wallet, your photo would be in...
⛪God's Statement
"I don't question YOUR existence." -- God
⛪God, Money, and the Soul
God you are the greatest lover You give the highest pleasure I want to remain yours forever But toda...
⛪God, Satan, and Food
In the beginning, God created the heavens and the Earth. And the Earth was without form and void, an...
⛪Haircut During Sermon
A pastor, known for his lengthy sermons, noticed a man get up and leave during the middle of his mes...
⛪Heaven and Hell: Sharing vs. Selfishness
A man spoke with the Lord about heaven and hell. The Lord said to the man, "Come, I will show you he...
⛪Heaven's Duck Problem
One day three teenage girls were driving along when they had a terrible accident. They were all sent...
⛪Heck
Heck is a place for people who don't believe in Gosh.
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